Costume College 2019 || The Introvert's Guide (ft. Bernadette Banner)

– What if we do, like, vlogception? (laughing) We’re doing vlogception right now Cathy’s vlogging me vlogging Cathy Cathy’s giving me a life lesson about taking breaks – [Cathy] Oh, I have to stop giving advice, don’t I? – No, you don’t, your advice is very valuable – [Cathy] By now, you may have seen a few vlogs of Costume College It looks like a really awesome, inspiring, exciting event, doesn’t it? But you may also be thinking that it looks totally overwhelming If you’re an introvert, and especially if you also live a million miles away, you may be feeling like an event or convention like this one could never be a realistic possibility for you In that case, it’s time to show you another side to Costume College Here’s how Team Introvert does it – We successfully peopled – We did, and it was okay, it was okay – We survived – Yep (recording rewinding) I’ve just arrived at Costume College This is the 10th anniversary of the first time I came, so I have a few of these under my belt now I have arrived on Thursday It should have been Wednesday But I had a very long trip with an unexpected delay So I’ve arrived at 11 o’clock, Thursday morning I always try to get in at least a day early That is just because A, I’m coming from England, which is a heck of a long way, and I just like to have a day to get through the worst of the jet lag Just be chilled and ready for everything to begin, so I’m not like, launched headlong into all the crazy Over the years, there have been a few times when I’ve felt frazzled or overwhelmed or I’ve even had a meltdown right in the middle of Costume College and missed part of it I’ve certainly had times when I’ve ended up in my room like, wrapped in a curtain in the corner, because I was just so, just overwhelmed with everything, with a big crowd of people and all of that, so I might show you in this video some of my little tricks and tips for doing events like this I don’t just do Costume College I do business events and all sorts of conferences, and I’ll be showing you, you’ll be seeing behind the scenes and how I do this and how I cope Because, frankly, I live on my own and I work from home, so I spend a lot of time on my own in my daily life So, coming to an event like this is a huge culture shock I’m suddenly in this huge crowd of people My massage therapist just left I come from literally the other side of the world By the time I get here, I can be pretty cranky and tired and stiff, so if I’ve paid that amount of money already to come all this way, I might as well spend another $100 and have somebody come and completely chill me out, ready to get the most out of this event There is a service called soothe.com, where you can book a massage therapist to literally come to your hotel room and they will come and give you an hour’s massage After I’ve come all this way, I might as well do everything I can to be, to feel at my best It’s not for everybody, but it’s something that I’ve discovered that really works for me The next thing I’m going to do, and this costs nothing, is I just sit here on the first day, when I’m chilled, and quiet, and I just think about what is my intention for this event? What do I actually want to get out of this year? What is the one thing, above all other things, that I want to get out of this? Because I find that if I don’t go into it with an intention, then I tend to end up trying to do all the things and get the most out of it by doing everything, and that just doesn’t work, ’cause I end up just frazzled and overwhelmed, and like burning out or melting down So, if I know exactly why I’m here, I can pick and choose what I do I’m really interested in where we’re going as a community, so that’s the sort of thing I want to learn about, and I want to talk about with people, so that doesn’t necessarily involve being at classes all the time, or doing specific things that are like on the menu A lot of what happens at Costume College can be what happens between classes, or in the hallways, or spontaneous conversations that happen, so that’s pretty much where my intention is for this year, and that might change, through the weekend

You might come here with one intention and leave with a different one So, we’ll see how this goes This one is fairly simple, (suspenseful music) because these ones at Costume College, you can just pour water in, put your cup with your teabag in, in the bottom, and you’re done (machine whirring) But, I mean, who wants to drink tea out of a paper cup? The way to do this is, early in your stay, you order room service They will bring you an actual cup and saucer, ladies and gentlemen Constance, are you in the market for English Breakfast here? This seems to be all they have – [Constance] Could I have Earl Grey? I’ve brought my own – [Cathy] Oh, excellent Are you going to endure the paper cup, or, you’ve got your own cup as well, excellent – [Bernadette] Oh no! – I don’t know whether this– – [Bernadette] It can collapse a little bit – [Cathy] Oh, okay, it can collapse slightly – [Bernadette] This is an adventure – [Cathy] Earl Grey, ladies and gentlemen The only way to fly I probably should have run it through with tap water first, but we’ll see Are you feeling lucky, Constance? (laughing) – [Bernadette] Would you be averse to it vaguely tasting like coffee? – [Cathy] Are you going to risk the creamer? – [Constance] I think I’ll have it black – [Bernadette] Ladies and gentlefolk, no matter how many years of experience you have with these things – [Cathy] Uh, eight – [Bernadette] Never enough – Oh, has it tripped again? Yeah, it’s tripped again – [Cathy] Oh – [Bernadette] We have relocated to the bathroom because we kept shorting out the electricity Nine years later – [Cathy] What time is the pool party? – [Bernadette] 7 Wow, that’s…… full – [Cathy] You may need a straw, Constance I think you’ll agree that’s a masterpiece (laughing) – [Bernadette] This is true British artistry right here (suspenseful music) (recording rewinding) – It’s 5:30 AM in England – Oh no – I like to try to get to bed pretty early and not stay up too late That gives me a chance to just calm down a bit and let my mind settle, which is one of the ways I can pace myself, so this is the point where I’ll sort of start tidying So, it’s sort of resetting for tomorrow Drink lots of water, also good Okay, what’s my focus tomorrow? What are the two or three things that I want to make sure I do tomorrow? What even is the one thing, that even if I achieve nothing else tomorrow and just spend time hanging out, chatting to people, what’s the one thing I want to make sure I go and attend or do or get involved in? So, that’s what I’m doing now This was Thursday, goodnight! Good morning, it’s Friday morning I think I’m already a little worse for wear, but you know, I’ve come from the other side of the world, so that’s okay I’m a little jet lagged, I’m a little tired I’ve had about six hours of sleep and then went and swam, so I’m feeling extremely chilled out or maybe just tired, I have no idea This afternoon and evening is going to be fairly full-on, so a chilled morning is kind of vital Again, this is what I said about setting intentions The major things for today to focus on are, we have a meet-up for all the YouTube ladies in the lobby at 3 o’clock, and then the social this evening You’re already Ironing your veil for tomorrow night, aren’t you? – [Bernadette] Yes, whoosh – [Cathy] Whoosh We are engaged in the act of strategic peopling This is how introverts do Costume College We are choosing to have plenty of quiet times, and now, we are strategically going down and being seen and being around when we know it’s going to be reasonably busy and we’ll see lots of people – [Bernadette] Not that we don’t want to see people – No, but we want to see people strategically – Yes – So if we are around at particular time when lots of people are around, then we can concentrate the peopling – Yes – [Marika] So yeah, this is the foundation layer, and then I have my first closure, my second, third – [Cathy] This is amazing (crowd chattering) – Fourth, and then fifth – That is very, yes – Yeah, so I went all-out with this – This is amazing – And then on the sleeves, I actually have my husband’s and my daughter’s constellations and my constellations – [Cathy] Oh, fantastic Excellent, so as in your zodiac signs? – [Marika] Yeah, zodiac signs – [Cathy] Okay, we’re going to do a historically accurate Worth, but we’re going to flat-line it with TARDISes, that works – [Marika] Oh yeah, I couldn’t resist – [Cathy] Notice how this shape, the cording creates the shape You can see the shape going on there, yeah – [Marika] I’m very happy with how this one turned out – [Cathy] Yeah, that’s good, pride in your work See, this is what is possible – [Marika] Yeah, yeah – [Cathy] Despite the fact that you’re very proud of it, would you still say that it’s not perfect? – Oh, it’s not perfect by any means There are so many things that I’ve learned from making this one, but this is my, I think, ninth corset I’ve made, and there’s still so many things that I’m learning every single time

and that, I don’t think, will ever stop, so – [Cathy] But it is possible to be proud of your work – [Marika] It’s beautiful, though, oh, I’m extremely proud of it – [Cathy] Without it being perfect first – Yeah, I’m very proud of it (laughing) – [Cathy] Good We have a meet-up at 3 o’clock It’s about 25 to, and I’m just, we’re just having, again, punctuating the socialising with just, {exhale}, calm down, so we can never get overstimulated too much Come back to our rooms Bernadette’s looking at her video footage I’m just freshening up a bit, ready for this meet-up, which basically for me involves putting more concealer on So, this is it We’re going to be going down and doing this meet-up We’ll see how many people show up I’m wearing pretty much the outfit that I wore in Bernadette’s train video, when we went on the stream trains in Loughborough, so I hope that will be recognisable People seem to recognise me, but that would help, I thought, so, also, my ribbon stream now That’s one of my favourite things about Costume College, it’s the fun ribbons, because they help you socialise I think I’m ready to go I think, nearly ready to go (upbeat music) (dramatic orchestral music) And now, PJs and tea – [Bernadette] Sleep, yes – Good morning, it’s Saturday morning I’ve been watching Noelle’s daily vlogs from Costume College and feeling the difference between being an introvert and an extrovert, because Noelle is very much the extrovert I’m looking at all that she’s fitting in and all that she’s doing and feeling like, wow, I’m not getting as much out of this as she is because she just has the energy to be out there so much more, and it also may be giving you the impression that, no, you could never do this because you’re an introvert There are different ways to do Costume College If you’re an introvert, you can do it at your own level and choose, like I was saying, set intentions and be very strategic about exactly what you want to do and what is not so important to you so you get out of it what you need You don’t have to do everything in order to get the value out of it A) First thing I’ve learned this year is, well, I need to come in earlier and not make it so hard on myself by trying to fly in and fly out again I make this hard for myself Surely, you know the feeling Wow, I can do it this way or I could do it… the easy way! And I lost my train of thought again See, this is what it’s like Nope, it’s gone Today’s all about the Gala That’s the focus, that’s the number one priority Other than that, I would usually be teaching this morning I’m having a bit of a year off from teaching,

except from doing that one class with Lauren and Abby and Cindy So, this year, it would be nice to actually go to a class or two There is a class this morning about Worth, which is one of my great obsessions It’s between midday and 2:30, so it gives me an opportunity to have a very long, lazy morning, and then to have time to come back and prepare for the Gala Other thing I’ve learned, if you’re an introvert and you’re coming to Costume College, get a room on a high floor, (traffic roaring) because the noise down here from the traffic is unbelievable, especially if you live in the country and this is unusual for you to be a city, so top tip for Costume College, if you’re a quiet person, go for a high floor And that’s all I have to say for now But rest assured, if you’re watching Noelle’s vlog and seeing the extrovert version of Costume College, that’s not the only way to do it You make Costume College your own, depending on what your interests are and what your energy level is and how many thousands of miles you’ve travelled to be here and how different your time zone is, so it can be done I am overachieving Look at me, I’m going to a class, hey I’ve got this down (laughing) – [Bernadette] Wait What were we talking about like, before we got into aliens and advertising? – We were talking about teaching classes – Oh, yeah! – It was actually fun for me to go to a class about something I know about, but the best part about it was they own original Worth gowns, and they brought two with them “So, here are some museum gloves “You want to handle a Worth gown? “Can you like, take care of that gown over there for us, “Cathy, while we take care of this one?” And it was really cool, looking at this gown with everybody and discovering it and noticing things about it and looking at, ooh, does it have a pocket and what kind of pocket does it have and what’s the waistband like? When we look at Dior dresses and think about, you know, 20th century couture techniques Dior was using old Victorian techniques And that is what we think of now as “couture techniques”, the stuff that Dior was doing – [Bernadette] Well, you know, it’s actually like– – he got from Victorian dress – One of the projects that’s been in the back of my head is to do a reconstruction of like, a 1950s couture thing from the mindset of, you know, historical dressmaking, ’cause there’s a lot of handwork in that – Yeah, there is – It’s a lot of, you know, traditional historical techniques How similar are they? – Yeah – That would be an interesting project One day, when I eventually want to branch out from strictly pre-World War 1 – Yeah (calm music) (laughing) It is happening! (inspiring music) I think we’ve made the most of Saturday, don’t you? – [Bernadette] Yes, I think so – It’s time to wind down, which can be challenging when it’s been a really great night

and you really need to go to sleep and you are very tired, but you’re also very excited and on a high So, I’m going to go and do the same thing I did last night Get on the floor I find yoga very useful because, when there’s a lot of tension or anxiety or you want to calm down, it’s kind of hard to calm down your mind, but it can be easier to calm down your body If you can get the anxiety or the pent-up energy out of your body, it helps get it out of your mind, so I find one of the shortcuts to calming down is to get myself into a physical position that automatically starts to calm me down, so that’s why I say lying on the floor or lying in child’s pose, great way to calm down, so I’m going to do that now You just like, kneel like that Your feet flat Your knees wide, and just lie forward I’m no yoga teacher, but like this – [Yoga Instructor] Knees fairly wide, extending your right arm off to the left underneath your left arm – I’m better with the people now I’m getting over the culture shock, but it’s Sunday morning and I’m very, very physically tired We were up ’til about midnight and I really am going to do very little this morning because I have a class that I’m co-teaching at lunchtime On days when I teach, I do try to get as much rest as I can in the morning because I’m really committed to giving my absolute best, and just before that, there will be a meet-up for Stitchlings, our Foundations Revealed members, at 12:30, so that will be taking place first and then we’ll be going into My class, our class I *will* be “compos mentis” by then Right, it is time, we’re having a Stitchlings meet up for all the Foundations Revealed people Cindy is bringing some of her extant corsets from the Redthreaded collection, so – [Bernadette] Look at the lighting in this elevator – It is pretty good, isn’t it? – Anyway, you were saying? – Anyway, yes Okay, let’s do this – [Woman] Hey, Cathy – [Cathy] Hey, how are you doing? – [Cynthia Settje] Then there’s this pretty little one (crowd chattering) I want to hand this one around because I want you all to feel how lightweight this corset is It feels like *nothing*, and that’s something that you really don’t understand until you hold an extant one, right? And you’re just like, it feels like a piece of paper But this one is whalebone That one’s steel This one, this is like 1890s, I believe, and I’m just going to – [Student] Oh, it’s bent – [Student] It’s so small – The busk is bent – This busk is bent into that nice belly curve, but the busk is really thin and really, really light And there’s a tonne of staining on this poor thing, which is part of why I don’t mind handing this one around, you know? It’ll be fine – [Bernadette] It looks like a frosted cupcake – [Marika] That was my intention – With the white like, crimpy ruffles – [Morgan Donner] I think I was about a thousand in, so you were getting some good traction – I was following you both when I had zero subscribers (laughing) – Yeah Anyways, okay (recorded piano music) – {singing scales} Nay nay nay nay nay nay nay nay nay Nay nay nay nay nay nay nay nay nay nay nay nay – [Voice coach] And you can just – great chord! – and again (crowd chattering) – Finding a group of people, finding out what they need, what they want, and satisfying that need, that’s what they’ll give you money for, rather than them doing me the favour of paying me so that I can do my hobby It’s about them, not about you Well, it is Sunday night and it’s all over It always seems to be over really suddenly You’re in the middle of it and then suddenly, boom, everybody’s gone – Well, we all went out to the pool and we sat out there for, admittedly, a couple of hours, but when we walked back into the hotel, back into the lobby, it was weird because it was like, suddenly, it was a normal hotel with like, muggles, no people in bustle gowns crowded around bars

– How was your second year at Costume College? – It was a lot better than last year, because last year, I felt like, well, I had no clue what was going on, I was very confused You were the only person I knew here So, like, I didn’t really know anyone I’m also a highly anxious human being, so I was like, at my nerve’s end, pretty much from like, Friday afternoon, which is like, the whole time, up through the end of the weekend Yeah, this time I felt like I had a better concept of what was going on I knew more people, so it felt more comfortable Yeah, I felt overall pretty decent – Good – Yeah, this time, which I wasn’t expecting I was expecting, I went into this weekend fully expecting to be at my nerve’s end, but like, prepared for that, but I don’t think I was – Good – Yeah – The warmer the climate, the colder the air conditioning – I mean, I was sitting in class literally shivering Today, I was prepared Today, I wore socks over stockings under my wool skirt, as I do in the winter in New York City, and I was still cold, but better than yesterday – Having discussed the climate – The weather, as we do in Britain – You are now an honorary Brit – Thank you – I shall anoint you with my teaspoon – Oh, you are literally serious, okay – Yeah (laughing) You are now British – I’m honoured How did you feel this year? – It was quite an unusual year because I was in a connecting room with you Usually, I am very isolated in my own room It was rather lovely to have one main person who I was hanging out with – Yeah, that was nice, because it also felt like, when I was in my room, I didn’t feel isolated Like, last year, I felt like whenever I was in my hotel room even though I needed that space, I felt like I was missing, like, I should have been downstairs because I was missing something I feel like if you go into Costume College, and this is difficult to do if it’s your first time, because you don’t know what to expect, but this year, I felt like, you know, I could go into Costume College with goals What do I hope to achieve at Costume College? Not like, take all of the classes, but like, what I wanted to do at Costume College, the reason why I was going, was to meet people who watch my videos, because I feel like now a lot of people are coming because of the vlog, so like, connect with people personally and to see you, because I only get to see you a couple times a year Both of those were achieved, and so even though I didn’t take all of the classes, I still feel like it was very successful because I met a lot of people and I got to live with you for four days – Yeah Just to watch, as an observer, as a business owner in this space, and get an overview of where are we as a community, where are we going, what are people interested in, and that’s my thing and your thing So, we love looking at like, the 35,000 foot big picture, and like, ooh, I see where this is going – Let’s analyse some stuff – Let’s analyse stuff – Let’s fly across the country just so that we have stuff to analyse (laughing) Okay, so, last year (emotional music) at Costume College, you asked me, would I come back? And I said probably not Maybe it will be like an every other year thing, but like, it was a long weekend, it was very stressful, it was a long way to come, it was very expensive for me because I did it last minute Don’t do that, book early It wasn’t until I got home and I realised, it just sunk in, like, how many other people in this costuming community there are, doing amazing things, and I just like, had this intense wave of inspiration for like two weeks, and I just permitted myself I didn’t say like, oh, I have other stuff to be doing I can’t sew right now, but I just let myself stop everything and just work on stuff Whatever I felt inspired to do for two weeks, and well, part of that was the walking skirt adaption video that I had been putting off for years that I finally did because I had the inspiration to do it, and that video ended up building my channel, but that’s, that’s– – It was your first viral video, yeah – Yeah, that’s a different story, so the thing that– – So, really it’s been a big part in the whole year of– – Yeah, well, the thing that determined like, what made me realise, like, I need to come back This thing is actually kind of more important than I realised at the time, is that, yeah, that wave of inspiration, so I’m hoping that will happen again, and despite how tired and exhausting and overwhelming the weekend is, still is, I was just saying to you in the elevator on the way up Like, I do still feel kind of like withdrawal right now Like, it’s Sunday night, everyone’s gone, but do I get to wake up and go to class tomorrow again? Like, I’m exhausted and I shouldn’t be doing that, but like, I kind of want to, but I kind of don’t Like, I miss it – So, packing and home tomorrow And onto the next thing

I think that’s a good place to fade out – Okay (giggling) Success!